Lately I’ve been thinking about expectations. I saw the quote ‘sometimes we expect more from others because we would be willing to do that much for them,’ and it really resonated with me.
As long as you’re doing things out of the goodness of your own heart rather than because you’re expecting something in return, I don’t think you can ever truly be disappointed. Of course, it can be hard at times when you put forth a lot of effort into a friendship or relationship or anything else and not feel you get the same level of respect or thoughtfulness back.
It can be absolutely frustrating when, say, you call your friend on their birthday every single year and they never remember to call you on yours (silly example, but I’m making a point!). Or if we take it to another level – your friend or loved one is going through a rather difficult time and you are there for them the whole way through, and then when you are going through a less than ideal time, they’re nowhere to be found.
Something I’ve learned is to take people for who and what they are. It’s as simple as that. They aren’t changing. No one is, especially as we all grow older. Your best friend may be the absolute worst when it comes to returning calls, for example, BUT you accept that because she’s your best friend, and it is what it is. While it can be annoying as anything, you deal. You accept her and love her for who she is.
I used to expect a lot from people. I really did. I figured if I remembered to check in on friends when they have big, important moments or events happening in their lives , they should do the same for me. And then I would be disappointed when that didn’t happen. I’ve gone through those emotions and feelings.
Fast forward to today, and I really try to not expect almost anything at all, from anyone. Does that come off as negative? Maybe, but I truly don’t mean for it to, promise! I just have learned to do from my heart and because I want to do. If I don’t get anything similar back, then that’s perfectly OK. It’s OK because I don’t go into it with the expectations or hopes of anything in return. In fact, I don’t go into it with any thoughts at all; just actions, and those actions come from an honest, heartfelt place.
If I can give you any piece of advice on this topic it’s simply to not expect (as harsh as it may sound). Do what you do because you want to do it, and not because you want anything in return. It’s as easy as that!
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