Thoughts From My Desk: Thinking Positively

Matthew and I were up in Connecticut this weekend with family, and on Saturday night we were with my sister-in-law’s aunt who is a Psychologist. Somehow we got on the topic of the #100happydays hashtag I’m sure you’ve seen floating around social media. While it may look like just another hashtag, it really is so much more.

The purpose of #100happydays is to make you find something good (‘happy’) in each and every day. Because there is ALWAYS something good in each and every day. I promise.

Our brains are so accustomed to go to the negative or the ‘bad’ thing rather than seeing what’s good. It’s a lot easier to complain it seems then to be grateful. It’s truly so important to try to force yourself and train your brain to think positive over negative. Like in the book ‘The Secret,’ where it talks about saying a positive statement rather than a negative, it will help you with being grateful and finding a silver lining even in the worst of days.

For example, I’m not the best on an airplane. I need wine on every flight, even if it’s early in the morning (in fact, as I write this, I’m on a plane, and it’s 7:30am and yes I have wine in hand). Rather than thinking to myself before a flight ‘It better not be a bad flight. I really hope there is no turbulence,’ I try to say ‘I hope it’s a good flight and a smooth ride.’ This may not seem like a big difference, but just switching out the negative words (‘not’, ‘no’, etc) you’re already looking at the glass half full. And while those statements may not make the flight any less bumpy, it’s a state of mind.

Even if you’re not doing #100happydays, I challenge you to still try to find something good, no matter what, in each and every single day. Even if it’s simply that you make every stoplight on the way to work or that you don’t have a line at the grocery store or that you get a close parking spot. Start small and work your way up. Eventually your mind will be so used to thinking these happy and positive thoughts that negative thoughts will be few and far between, and quite fleeting.

And I’ll end this by giving you an example in my own life.

My family is spread out throughout the country. My brother, sister-in-law and nephew live in Maryland. My parents split their time between Connecticut and Texas. I have cousins, aunts, uncles, and grandparents in Florida, New York, California, and elsewhere. In an ideal world, we would all live in the same city and see each other all the time. However, this is not the case for us. We see each other at family events and at most holidays, but day to day we’re not all always together. I look at friends of mine and see how lucky they are to have their entire family in one city. It’s hard. My nephew is 5 months old and growing by the minute, and it kills me that I only will see him every couple months. However, instead of being down about this, I tell myself that I’m very lucky. I’m very lucky that I have a close-knit family that can travel and see each other as much as possible. I’m very lucky that I have a precious healthy adorable nephew. I’m very lucky that my brother and sister-in-law are living in Maryland because it’s best for my brother’s amazing career. I’m very lucky that my family is healthy, most importantly. And even if it’s a plane ride away, I’m lucky I get to see them when I do.

Like I said, even when you think there isn’t, there is always something to be grateful for.

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